Sterile By Design

Sterile By Design

Terminology

• Vasectomy: A surgical procedure performed to sterilize a man by cutting or blocking the vas deferens, the tubes that carry sperm from the testicles to the urethra.
• Bilateral Salpingectomy: A surgical procedure performed to sterilize a woman by removing both fallopian tubes, preventing eggs from reaching the uterus.
• Hysterectomy: A surgical procedure performed to remove the uterus, often used to treat conditions like fibroids, endometriosis, or cancer. It can also be used as a form of permanent sterilization.
• Childfree: A term used to describe individuals who choose not to have children, often due to personal, financial, or environmental reasons. This also implicitly includes not wanting to adopt or foster children. It differs from “childless,” which implies a desire for children but an inability to have them.

Why I Got A Vasectomy

I haven’t always known I didn’t want children, nor that I’d enter cybersecurity. In an Asian society where marriage and children are expected, choosing to be childfree is a rare choice, and undergoing permanent sterilization takes immense conviction and commitment. It is with pride that I share my journey to “sterility by design” and how it has empowered my approach to cybersecurity.

I was sterilized at 27, a decision made without a partner or children. My decision to get a vasectomy comes from understanding that pregnancy inherently causes women to suffer. To me, loving someone means avoiding causing them harm, including the suffering associated with pregnancy.

That is in addition to the erasure of identity that comes with motherhood, a unique form of suffering that strips women of their autonomy and individuality. Just visit any “women in the workplace” panel and see how almost every speaker inevitably mentions motherhood, as if it is the only thing that defines them. I refuse to be complicit in perpetuating this suffering.

A vasectomy is minimally invasive, with fewer side effects than procedures like a bilateral salpingectomy or even birth control pills. Given the evidence, why shouldn’t I take on this responsibility?

Parallels Between My Vasectomy And My Professional Life

In reproductive health, temporary solutions like condoms or contraceptives require ongoing effort and are prone to human error. Their effectiveness can’t be immediately verified, making them less predictable and harder to audit.

Similarly, in cybersecurity, relying on temporary measures like manual patching involves constant effort and vigilance. These approaches are error-prone and lack the certainty of a permanent solution.

A vasectomy provides a one-time, permanent solution, eliminating ongoing risk management. In cybersecurity, a well-architected, automated framework does the same, minimizing breaches through consistent protection without constant intervention. This proactive approach leads to better security outcomes and less stress, much like the benefits of permanent contraception.

Despite these advantages, why do people avoid more effective, permanent solutions? Whether in health or cybersecurity, reasons include lack of awareness, belief in minimal risks, or discomfort with making permanent decisions. Ignoring these options doesn’t make the risks disappear, and it reflects poorly on their understanding of responsibility and accountability.

If a security breach occurs, claiming ignorance or believing it “won’t happen to me” is unacceptable and could harm the reputation of the company I work for. Similarly, neglecting proactive reproductive health measures can have unintended consequences. We should hold ourselves to the same high standards in both personal and professional life by making deliberate, informed decisions that align with our long-term goals.

What I Learned

Here are five key lessons from my journey toward “sterility by design”:

Rethinking Your Approach

“This is how we have always done things.”

This mindset is dangerous in cybersecurity, where the threat landscape is constantly evolving. I used to think similarly about parenting. I used to think that children would give life meaning. I never questioned this path because I didn’t fully understand the sacrifices both partners make to have children or the profound challenges of parenthood. It was easy to overlook the physical and emotional toll on women to maintain fertility and conceive. It was natural to consider that others may have nothing interesting about themselves, that they needed children in order to have their lives fulfilled.

As I learned more, I began questioning: “Is this suffering necessary?”. This led me to choose a vasectomy, a decision based on informed, introspective reasoning. It encouraged me to look internally for answers rather than living up to the expectations of people who may not have my best interests in mind.

Cybersecurity has also needed to evolve, leading to approaches like DevSecOps, integrating security directly into development processes. Just as we rethink approaches in cybersecurity, we can make proactive, long-term decisions in our personal lives for greater peace of mind. A sterile environment should not be a goal, but rather a byproduct of a well-architected security strategy.

Inaction = Not Having A Stance

In cybersecurity, being decisive and assertive is crucial. We must take clear positions on risks, defend them, and persuade others while being open to new information. Indecisiveness can lead to missed opportunities and a lack of direction, weakening an organization’s security posture.

In personal life, ambivalence about major decisions like having children can create instability in relationships. Similarly, ambivalence in professional settings lead to missed opportunities, a lack of direction, and undue burdens on others, forcing them to compensate for your lack of accountability. This undermines teamwork, trust, and ultimately, security.

Taking a proactive stance in both professional and personal settings fosters a culture of responsibility and accountability. This approach ensures we actively shape outcomes rather than merely react to circumstances.

Risk Management

In cybersecurity, there are four ways to manage risk: avoid, mitigate, transfer, and accept. Avoiding risk is the most effective strategy. In my personal life, I chose a vasectomy to avoid the risk of unintended parenthood, aligning my actions with my long-term goals.

I realized that by never having children, I would also be able to avoid certain industries entirely: early childhood, obstetrics, pediatrics, education, amongst others. This has allowed me to streamline my life, reducing my “attack surface”, and focus on areas that matter most to me. This is similar to how cybersecurity professionals focus on reducing the attack surface of their systems, limiting exposure to threats and vulnerabilities, improving overall security posture.

In addition, I can also extend this reduction in attack surface to my partner, who would reap the benefits of not having to bear the physical and emotional toll of pregnancy. This is akin to how cybersecurity professionals protect their users, ensuring they are not exposed to unnecessary risks. By proactively taking on the burden of family planning, I reinforce my dedication to shared responsibility, a key principle in both personal and professional relationships.

Empathy With Your Allies

People can be both the weakest link and the strongest asset in cybersecurity. Understanding others’ perspectives allows us to communicate, persuade, and collaborate more effectively.

The world is increasingly becoming hostile toward the childfree, particularly women. With abortion banned in several countries, access to birth control becoming more restricted, and governments alarmed by declining birth rates, the autonomy of those who choose to remain childfree is under threat. As a man, I don’t face the direct consequences of pregnancy, but that doesn’t mean I can’t empathize with those who do. By making a clear and decisive choice with my vasectomy, I aim to be a stronger ally to the childfree community, and an advocate for intentional and informed decision making.

Likewise, cybersecurity professionals must also empathize with developers, sysadmins, and users. These groups often have great ideas for improving security, but they may face resistance or misunderstanding. By being supportive allies who understand their challenges, we can foster a culture of security that is inclusive, effective, and sustainable. We can implement effective security measures that are practical and minimally disruptive, fostering a secure, cooperative environment.

Planning A Playbook

“You are still young, and a vasectomy is permanent. What if you regret your decision?”

“A vasectomy’s permanence is precisely why I’m getting it. The chance of successful reversal decreases over time, so this early commitment addresses the risk of regret.”

This brief exchange helped develop my first playbook, using detractors’ arguments to strengthen my stance, giving a prepared, automated response, and shift conversations to a fact-based discussion, rather than subjective judgement about age and maturity. In cybersecurity, playbooks are also used to systematically identify threats and use them to reinforce defenses.

In both personal and professional contexts, the use of automation and playbooks serve to realize our goals. Being prepared and having a plan means actively shaping outcomes to your advantage, rather than just defending against potential risks.

Conclusion

My journey to achieve sterility by design has led me to consider the parallels between how I approach decisions in my personal life and my professional life. It has made me look at my values, beliefs, and goals in a new light, and has empowered me to make more effective decisions in both realms.

I understand this is a deeply personal decision that others may not agree with, and that is okay. The focus of this story was not about the vasectomy itself, but how the thought process behind it can be applied to our professional lives. I very much doubt that anyone would view commitment, strategic thinking, empathy, responsibility, and accountability as negative traits.

What’s Next?

My next article will explore how I plan my homelab’s expansion and longer-term strategic goals that will be met through the hands-on experience that will be gained from improving it. There are certain areas I plan to explore further, and I will share my thoughts on how I plan to achieve them.

nicholaschua@youread.me:~$ exit
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